Before we start this post I think it appropriate to discuss my background in this topic and the many years training and leading others in martial arts. I am a father of 3 high-speed boys ages 13, 10 and 6. I’ve been a national Judo competitor, Jiu-Jitsu competitor and wrestler for 30 years. I’ve spent most of my life competing and coaching grappling sports. I’ve had the opportunity to coach youth Judo, Jiu-Jitsu and Wrestling as well as lead men and women in Judo and Jiu-Jitsu training. One of the most profound things I hear from the older athletes who find grappling after their “prime” is that they wish they would have discovered these sports sooner and they wish they would have had their kids in them. I have had the unique experience as a child doing both team sports (baseball, soccer and football) and individual sports(Judo, Wrestling and Jiu-Jitsu). I hope you enjoy Blog #1 –Steven
There are so many benefits for enrolling your child into one of the many grappling sports. I’m speaking mainly about Jiu-Jitsu, Wrestling and Judo. Here are the 5 biggest reasons your child will prosper in life if you stick with them.
1.) Bully Proofing
One of the greatest benefits of teaching grappling to kids is their ability to protect themselves. In a day and age when words aren’t often enough to dissuade physical violence or a teacher/authority figure is too far away, it is helpful for kids to have the ability to defend themselves against wanton violence. Even if your child isn’t highly skilled in grappling, the skills provided can easily help minimize injury and preserve their well-being if the unthinkable happens. In a world where everyone seems to be becoming crueler and self-involved, the ability to prevent physical violence is more and more necessary. It is our job as parents and teachers to lead our children into the adult world. We should also arm them with the tools to protect themselves when words aren’t enough. A kid with these skills adds a different dynamic to their own self-defense. It gives their words teeth and claws. They are armed with weapons that empower them to not seek out trouble but to avoid it and the confidence to know they can defend themselves. Jiu-Jitsu remains one of the best practices where a smaller trained individual has every possible advantage over a larger untrained individual.
2.) Toughness
Grappling sports are difficult. They can be hard on the body and are physically stressful to train. Your kids are going to lose a lot during their first few weeks of jiu-jitsu training. The wins are earned through rigorous practices and at times rote drilling. Through this practice, they become comfortable being uncomfortable. This toughness bleeds over into other aspects of their life. They learn that their bodies are stronger than they give them credit for and that falls aren’t as scary, bruises aren’t as bad, and the occasional bloody nose isn’t the end of the world. Through the amazing sport of jiu-jitsu, we have personally seen kids go from very meek and passive children transition to tough and capable little scrappers on the mat. This same thing is true if you decided to pick up grappling as an adult as well. If you are patient and consistent you slowly watch them transform into kids that can push a little harder and dig a little deeper. Through the practice of grappling, kids begin to embrace hard training sessions and a lot of times wish to challenge themselves in competition, an otherwise scary venture for kids to volunteer for. Bring out their inner toughness, get them involved early in grappling sports.
3.) Discipline
Discipline has almost become ubiquitous in every martial arts form. It’s often a selling point when gym owners discuss the benefits of martial arts to the parents of prospective members. In broad terms, discipline is an easy sell but here’s what that looks like in tangible forms and what you might expect from kids who participate in grappling sports. Kids learn how to control their emotions. They are inherently labile emotionally. If they don’t get what they want right now, often they become inconsolable or distant, they cry and lash out. Through practice of martial arts kids become more comfortable regularly not getting what they want. They begin to learn patience and perseverance. They will not be good at first and through daily understanding that life is not all about immediate gratification they become more well-adjusted. They begin to control their emotions both physically and mentally. This leads to control of impulses and actions. Kids become able to focus on new techniques and how to sit through instruction without
interruption. Grappling also instills values like integrity, responsibility and humility into their regular practice. They learn through games and training how to play with integrity and to take accountability for their actions. The responsibility to care for smaller students and to be mindful of how they could protect others around them. They learn humility through getting beaten in matches and how to lower their ego to care for the others in the training environment. We often see this when the older kids take care of the younger/newer students on the mats. They learn how to practice a sport being mindful of size disparities and skill gaps. They really do learn how to care for one another despite this being a combat-based sport.
4.) Resilience
Kids need to lose to learn how to be good sports. In sports like jiu-jitsu, kids will lose early and often when they first start. Kids that learn how to be good sports through the wins and losses turn into well-adjusted men and women. These losses and wins will be based on their own merit and hard work. Team sports like baseball, football and soccer cannot facilitate this type of growth within kids in the same manner. It’s great to be a part of a team but these sports are collaborative, and your kids may experience wins and losses based on how good or bad the team is. Their success in grappling will be solely based on their effort. At the end of the day, they will be as good or bad as the effort they put forth. There isn’t a “team” to carry them to success. They can’t be held down by a “bad team” either. There is so much value in this sentiment. I don’t say that to disparage team sports because they do bring a lot of value to our children’s development, but nothing gives kids the “can do it” attitude like individual combative based sports. On their first day of training, they will likely be the newest kid in the room (unless they bring a friend). That means they will be nervous and anxious. When kids face these types of feelings and overcome them, they become more confident. They begin to have a mentality of taking on new and scary things because they have done it before and have had success. This produces in them the ability to take on new challenges in the face of fear. Kids will elect to choose courage over caution in a safe fashion. These things create kids who are resilient to change, pursue excellence and face fears. They begin to embrace new challenges and can operate well inside of the wins and losses.
5.) Friendships and Camaraderie
You can ask anyone in any jiu-jitsu gym who their friends are, and they will most certainly name most of their training partners. This is because even though this sport is hard and inherently competitive, you make the best friends in it. Most of my dearest friends are lifelong training partners. Most of the men who were in my wedding party were friends I met in grappling sports. We become close to those we are in proximity to regularly and the bond is deepened through the trials of grappling training. You begin to trust your training partners to have your best interests at heart. and the pain bond galvanizes the friendships. Kids who train often find many common interests with their training partners who are likely similar in age. It allows them to meet people who live close and share these interests. It provides a support system to them where kids are there to watch each other succeed in competition and in the training room. These kids often grow up together and are around in the different phases of life. The best part about these friendships is that it assists in keeping their interest when training gets tough. Kids want to go where their friends are and thus helps them stay committed to a seemingly lifelong process of grappling mastery.
In a culture that pushes kids further and further into creature comforts and laziness it is important to keep them active and strong. Physical activity is one of the best ways to build strong bones and ligaments, maintain healthy body awareness and physicality. If you ever wanted to try out a martial art, jiu-jitsu/submission grappling is the one to start with. We are happy to assist you in this process of this grappling education at Pyramid Jiu-Jitsu. If you are in the greater Memphis area, we are available for a free trial period to see if grappling is right for your child.